I brought Tina Dico's song "Where Do You Go to Disappear" as a souvenir from one of our vacations in Denmark. Last week, I randomly heard it again. It made me think about the many ways we "disappear" when things become too much for us.
For example, I hop on my bicycle and ride into the countryside. Or I grab my guitar and lose myself in the loud amplifier sound. These places of retreat help us recharge, gain some distance, and take a breath. We all need them.
But, as always, it all comes down to the right dose. And what we don't want to feel.
In modern times, we have countless ways to "escape": social media, streaming, online shopping, sweets, food, alcohol, working overtime, and more. But all of these are not genuine retreats; they're substitutes âš
They help us exchange a bad feeling temporarily for a better one, but the bad feeling never truly disappears; it lingers beneath the surface and comes back. This exchange can quickly become automatic and even an unnoticed addiction.
Sooner or later, we can't avoid giving our attention to the bad feeling. Whether it's boredom, stress, regret, fear, loneliness, overwhelm, disillusionment, and so on.
Where does it come from?
Often, deep down, we already know that something isn't right. There are questions we haven't answered for ourselves yet, maybe questions we haven't dared to ask ourselves.
Questions like:
💥 Am I living the life I want to live?
💥 Am I happy in my relationship?
💥 Do I want to stay?
💥 What are the things I deny myself from wanting?
💥 Am I content in my job?
💥 What do I think about my future?
💥 What scares me?
💥 What holds me back?
Once we have answers, we can decide what to do with them.
The decision might be:
🎯 "No, this isn't what I want, but I won't change anything. It's a conscious decision, and I won't disappear just because I feel bad about it."
Or it might be:
🎯 "No, this isn't what I want, and I'll change it. It's essential for me to be in harmony with myself and live my truth."
Both choices can be empowering, in my opinion.
Now, what about you? What questions are you avoiding?
Will you confront them?
My name is Martin Skopp, and as a life coach, I specialize in helping people overcome challenges and transform their midlife into the most fulfilling and rewarding phase of their lives.
You can book a free trial session here:
Comments