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Stop regretting wrong decisions

Updated: Sep 6, 2023

Stressed woman regretting her decisions
If I had made a different decision back then ...

Thoughts about our past, present, and future shape our mental well-being. One of the common traps is looking back at past decisions with regret, assuming they harmed us.

"If I had made a different decision back then, I would be better off today." is one of these typical thoughts.

- If I had moved away from here earlier...

- If I had taken that job offer back then...

- If I hadn't gotten involved with that person...

- If I had parented my children differently...

- If I had behaved differently back then...

Can you really be certain that this is true?

What other consequences and decisions would have arisen from it?

Would you have handled all of them well? Would you be better off today for sure?

Regret over wrong decisions expresses the belief that our lives are good and successful only when failures, wrong decisions, and negative experiences are absent.

When we cling to this ideal notion, we easily overlook that life teaches us the opposite: "wrong" decisions are an essential part of us.

It teaches us even more: they are not just there; they are actually there FOR US if we embrace them. Every result they produce carries information. We gather it and move forward, without hesitation, making more decisions, over and over again, until we figure out what works for us. We learn to grow, become stronger and bolder, create new possibilities. The life we experience as a result becomes richer and more intense.

Wouldn't it be a shame to trade all of that for regret in the future?

Success always feels great, but what makes us truly strong are the failures despite we keep going. Undoubtedly, there are plenty of examples of this in your life.

Do you now sense that the way you look back on your wrong decision doesn't provide you with the whole truth? It makes you uncertain and holds you back. But it's actually entirely optional.

To stop regretting past decisions requires nothing more than questioning your own thinking with the best of intentions and a sharp mind.

Once you start discovering options in your attitude towards "wrong" decisions, regret diminishes. Soon, it only takes a decision on how you want to consciously think about it from now on. That's where regret ends.

One final tip: Want to outsmart regret? Use it for you!

This is how: Imagine yourself 5 years into the future and ask yourself, what could be the things you might regret not having done?

Following your dream. Maybe being more courageous? Being less judgmental of yourself? Being more authentic to yourself? Empowering yourself? Taking more risks? Being not afraid to fail?

Ready for the next step?

My name is Martin Skopp. As a life coach, I help people who feel stuck in their midlife.

📌 I offer a free online coaching session where you can learn about what my coaching can do for you:


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