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Overcoming Feeling Inferior with Unmatched Self-Confidence

Man feeling with placid expression, feeling self-confident

"Have you heard the news? Robert is getting promoted."

"Typical, just talking big and sucking up to get ahead..."

"Exactly. And now he's working closely with the board, he'll soon realize what he's gotten himself into."

Our NEED for SELF-ASSESSMENT is one we rarely consciously perceive but constantly fulfill.

The most common way to satisfy this need is by comparing ourselves to others: our coworkers, bosses, friends, relatives, neighbors, people we encounter on social media. We filter information about looks, opinions, happiness, wealth, social status, success, skills, etc., and compare – whether consciously or unconsciously.

Unfortunately, what sounds like more than normal social behavior is rarely achieved objectively and for our own good.

⭕ For example, we compare ourselves to people who are as bad or worse off than us in a certain area: people who are less happy or successful. It's a quick way to boost our damaged self-esteem.

⭕ The other option is comparing ourselves to those we believe are superior in certain aspects. It can be motivating, but often leads to devaluing our self-esteem, envy, and jealousy.

In both cases, we are SURE TO LOSE.

Comparing ourselves to others puts us at high risk of:

- having a false image of ourselves,

- trading our uniqueness for limiting standards,

- using untrue or incomplete ideas about others as our benchmark,

- not living authentically.

On top of that, we feel awful: less valuable, disadvantaged, like failures. But that's not all. This bad feeling directly fuels how we act and interact with others. It determines our decisions and how far we venture in life.

⭕ The alternative? The need for self-assessment can be entirely satisfied through our own SELF-CONFIDENCE.

In strong self-confidence, which doesn't require comparison with others, I can:

- define what I want to think about myself,

- value my own permission more than that of others,

- feel secure about myself and my abilities,

- describe what matters to me and act accordingly.

Strong self-confidence makes every comparison obsolete. It always WINS.

Self-confidence is not an innate quality; it's something that requires practiced skills. In my view, that's very good news.

How about you? How do you satisfy your need for self-assessment?

Interested in learning how to build self-confidence?

📌 I offer a free online coaching session where you can learn about what my coaching can do for you:


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